Adult children faced with aging parents’ failing health issues and senior home care often create friction among themselves, sometimes reverting back to old oppressive moments of sibling rivalry, when making choices for Dad and Mom. Everyone cares about what happens but may not agree on the same decisions, which triggers misunderstandings and conflicts. Compromising about any home care, stroke care, or dementia care for the elderly can be challenging but attainable with communication, honesty and equally informing one another.

Many adult children accept the primary caregiver role by emotional ties, geographic location, age, or as they take on more and more tasks. Encourage all sibling participation early on and try not to make them feel resentment or left out. For those who remain distant, do everything possible to keep or get them involved. Give those having a desire to be updated a weekly report concerning Dad and Mom. Keep everyone in the loop if possible – solicit their help, advice and support.

Keeping siblings informed via telephone, email, mail, texting, social networking and visits eliminates potential family stress and anxiety. Caring for Dad and Mom during their aging years should be the first priority for everyone. Stay in touch.

Tips to keep siblings informed:

• Use social media especially for those out of town.
• Share appointments, reports, and objective feedback from professionals.
• Pick up the phone and call one another or send a text message, “Dad’s lab results were good.”
• Schedule family meetings and discussions.

Each sibling, from the primary caregiver to those living out of town, have obligations and rights to anything and everything that concerns Dad and Mom.

Stay in touch!